Major Fartunescu and the Misadventures of Department 13

Somewhere in another country, mafia boss and crypto narcotics kingpin Alexis Tephlon has half the government in his back pocket. The police are powerless, because, well, have you met the local police? So our hero, Major Fartunescu, decided to do something. He took a nap. And then he put together a crack team that’s unbeatable, unbribable, and stays moist and tender while remaining crispy on the outside. His partner, Captain Mothertrucker, respects him. His criminologist, Sofi Lorenu, loves him. His boss, General Drunkenwimp, likes to yell at him. His “frenemy,” newscaster Milena Suck-Sexcu, investigates him. His main suspects, Alexis Tephlon and Anubis Frumos, underestimate him. But by the time he’s done, his name will go down in history, way down. He’s the soon to be famous…Major Fartunescu.